Okay, so I have taught child & human development for over 25 years.
Okay, so I was stunned that Apple allowed the "Baby Shaker" app to thrive for three days before removing it from the "app store".
Okay, so I was outraged at Apple's generic/press release drivel apology and don't even get me started on Sikalosoft..."I guess we made some people mad" approach to developing an application that shows how to shake a baby to death if they don't stop crying.
IS ANYONE MINDING THE STORE....The iTUNES APP STORE???
Let me see if I can get your attention. First Johnny uses his $25. iTunes card and after a seamless enrollment, orders the following downloads for his shiny iPhone (yes, Apple Board Member, Al Gore, he's a tween, thirteen years of age.)
Now it's time to use his downloaded VooDooFun app (.99 cents)...Johnny doesn't really like his English teacher. He uploads her yearbook picture on Voodoofun and sticks the s**t out of her. Now Johnny is ready to ramp it up a notch, so it's on to Hot Banana, a masturbating simulation game, that allows him to compete with George across the classroom via iPhone. As you might imagine,Johnny's a little churned up. Let's open his Bunny & Me, where he can make Bunny do about anything in addition to blowing on his now steamed-up iPhone screen and make Bunny's dress go flying up. By the way, iGirl will do the same. Oh, oh, the principal walked in, how about, gunsta or Mafia 1? Johnny can point and shoot at the principal. If the sound is loud enough, the school might have to have an evacuation....coo-o-ol. Of course, Johnny is leading in Mafia 1 area of Trashing Cars...good training for when Johnny drops out of school and does this for real. After lunch it's time to blow up a few kitties with the iKitty app. Johnny now sends a shout out to his homeys to meet at his "crib" after school for a Beirut. What is Beirut? This is a cool Code for a BeerPong Basement style drinking game. You see Johnny lives in a single parent home and Mom won't be home for hours. Sally will bring the beer/wine coolers in her backpack. Now no basement game is complete without a Truth or Dare, x rated and Johnny downloaded that easily...so let the sex games begin. Of course one has to keep track of all this fun, so it's time to tune into Get Durk Drunk...just to see how many drinks it takes to go over the legal limit before Mom's car hits the driveway. Fast forward to homework time, but Johnny again is bored and has learned a nifty way to not only download Penthouse from the iPhone app, zinio newsstand, but how to put it right on his PC for better views. Bedtime snack: another Hot Banana!
To put some relevance to the above editorial simulation, it is telling that the billionth download that Apple brags so much about came from a tween, thirteen year old Connor Mulcahey. Apple iPhones stands to make bazillions from the purchases of minors and this would not be so egregious if there was some semblance of oversight at Apple before these creepy, pervasive, disgusting downloads reached your child's iPhone. All a developer needs to do is file a form and pay $99. Now, any genius or jerk can enter his/her "game"? Oversight? You tell me. Damaging albeit destructive to young minds? Without a doubt.
Feel free to go to youtube and look up the above apps. Please note, the age and gender of the child demonstrating these apps for you. Anyone need a fire extinquisher?
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